Sell-out with Me Tonight

Not too much to say today. Last night I was DD for Jeff and Jack when we went to the Metro and boy did they need it. Murph came out and switched over to Mac-Daddy Murph, a form not seen since about Feburary...it was amazing to watch hehe. Jeff was just Jeff, you can tell he is wasted when he starts buying pitchers of shots and handing them out to every girl he sees. It wasn't great fun for me but I watched some sportscenter and those guys had a blast and I talked to some people I haven't talked to inawhile so I can't complain.

Tonight though.............REEL BIG FISH!!!!!!!!

I will definetly update on that one.

So much to say, so much to say..........

Actually it's quite the oppiset of that but I felt like posting.

So what did I do today? Went to class, went weight lifting, got lunch, compared notes from saturday with jeff and jer, played tennis, cleaned my car, played pool with teegan, met lea and cherie at gavins to say hey, went to hiels with jeff and jen to chill for a bit, wrote this post.

Thats in chronological order.

Suck it Trebeck

I'm sippin' on coke and rum.......I'm like, so what I'm drunk

Ok here I am, 8 AM on the morning after my best friend's 21st birthday..................still drunk (like stumbling drunk). You will have to excuse me (more than usual) for all my mistipings and horrible use of the english language.

Jeff was in a form rarely seen last night, and the highlight of it all was that I got him to puke.....took me till like 2:15 but I did what I set out for. We all went to Tink's, Flashback's and the Bog after starting drinking at his house with his fam./close friends whom are older. I forgot to call some people who wanted to go out and that is my full responsibility I got too hamered. See the thing is, I haven't drank in like a month and I hadn't drank till I was drunk in a REAL long time and everything just hit me so hard and so fast that I lost pretty much all memory so this is kinda a public appology to those I forgot to call, a weak one at that but an apology none-the-less.

The whole night was an awesome time, it reminded me of why I used to drink.........and why I stoped. Don't get the wrong impression, nothing bad happpened its just that for a long time all I did was go to places like tink's and flashback's, at least for a few hours every night of drinking, and they are LOADS of fun as long as you are loaded. After awhile though we stopped and just started going to normal "sit-down" bars and they got boring, quick, I mean real quick. Still even after they got boring it took me like 3 months to forget how fun drinking can be and just give it all up.

So here is my current problem: to drink or not to drink. See I want to have fun but when do I have that fun..........now or later??? Do I drink now and worry less about other things or wait till I get older and worry less about my job, my wife (if i can find someone I can stand long enough, heh) and my kids (if I don't kill them :) ). The answer is simple, both. I just can't get hard core about it. I'm not going back to fall semister (the semister of sin, treacherous thursdays) but I'm not joining AA either, I need a little of both. This decission should put a nice big smile on some people's faces.

Another thing, and it kinda goes along with the total lack of/cutting back of beer and things... I'm working at bettering myself for no one except for me, because if you do it for anyone else they'll be gone someday and you'll slip back into the bad things. I feel lame quoting eminiem and all but this is kinda how it has been for a couple years now "I keep running from something I never wanted SO bad," whenever I wanted anything lately, like real wanted it, i'd get so close to it then at the breaking point when either I get it or I fail........I've run away. I couldn't begin to tell you how many times that happened with girls, ask them for the first date, go out, get close, never get close again I either don't call again or act like an ass...it's like slicing your wrists because you don't want to hurt no more...it's been kinda sick (disclaimer: I am not depressed, not suicidial or anything like that, it's just a medaphor........a harsh one at that. I love my life more than most of you guys now, and that's all because of my friends). I'm not running anymore, or I am running rather, and lifting and not giving a fuck (well, I never lost that one) and just being ScottieP and not worrying about what will happen tomorrow because tomorrow never comes..........and I'm not gonna stop. No fear of commitment or fear of rejection or anything bad that happens to me to gonna stop me because at this moment I feel that is how I need to live. (That was SO like a motivational speech, i hope you all are SO motivated)

Another thing, thanks to everyone with their words of advice on what to do post-college and all their encouragements, i love all you guys.

Once again here is to Jeff Grasso, a man who deseveres many a good thing in life because he's put up with my shit since the fourth grade.

Reel Big Fish is comming up this thursday in Allentown, I can't wait!

And I'm spent..this took like an hour...wow.

Jeff and I - we're neva gonna give a fuck 'cause we better than you