"Call Me"

Yea, what the hell is that?

Seriously, this one isn't even about me.

Well, kinda.

Maybe some girls actually read this, I need your input here. When a girl touches you in some way and gives the "call me" what the fuck does that mean?? I dont mean a girl thats like a bud saying it, we're talkin girl you never called before girl.

And why does that shit happen only when you have someone else? Are all you women just obsessed with what you can't have?

Sometimes I should declare myself celebant just to get laid al the time.

Seriously

What am I doin' wrong?

That title is something I say alot as a joke to make fun of some of the guys that have girlfriends. I mean some of them are real chodes (costanza wannabe's and aids-patient wannabe's) so it's not really knocking myself but man tonight it finally hit me....

My first girlfriend ever, my first crush, my first kiss.....is now a professional model, and Im on the atkins diet.........man I went wrong someplace and I choose to blame them, the women I've dated, only because if I blamed myself it would open up a whole new can of worms that I would have to deal with (read: sarcasim)

I feel like John Cusak in High Fidelity

"Top 5 breakups of all time"

or maybe it's more like...

I feel like I'm in the J. Geils Band

"My blood runs cold, my memories have just been sold (or told or something), my angel is a centerfold"

Damn all you hot women Ive liked or like

All Things Must Pass

84 years ago the world was blessed with the kindest, intelligent soul it ever had. It lost that person last year.

R.I.P. Helen Baas

The Best Grandma/Person anyone could ask to know.